Carpenter stated that this view "dates to the late s, with explicit 'rules' appearing around the turn of the twentieth century, as in marriage manuals defining petting as 'literally every caress known to married couples but does not include complete sexual intercourse. When asked what techniques they used in their last ten sexual encounters, lesbians in their 30s were twice as likely as other age groups to engage in anal stimulation with a finger or dildo. In pornography, anal sex is commonly portrayed as a desirable, painless routine that does not require personal lubricant ; this can result in couples performing anal sex without care, and men and women believing that it is unusual for women, as receptive partners, to find discomfort or pain instead of pleasure from the activity. Therefore, the reverse of common practices was often portrayed. When stimulated together, women can experience enhanced pleasure and extremely intense orgasms. The latter was allowed because anal intercourse was considered equivalent to vaginal intercourse in this way; men were said to "take it like a woman" muliebria pati, "to undergo womanly things" when they were anally penetrated, but when a man performed anal sex on a woman, she was thought of as playing the boy's role. If all goes well, slowly insert your finger up to your first knuckle. Did you know there are two ring-like muscles that guard your anus, one under your control and one normally ruled by the involuntary nervous system? Those who enjoy either role may be referred to as versatile. When First Using Anal Sex Toys For first time users of anal sex toys, it is important to remember that using any kind of flexible type toys may be hard to insert as you may be tensing and inadvertently keeping your sphincter muscle tight and closed, not allowing the toy to enter. Hold each push down for a second or two before releasing. Prostate massage Male genital anatomy, showing the location of the prostate with respect to the rectum The abundance of nerve endings in the anal region and rectum can make anal sex pleasurable for men or women. Our Tantra training in the mid s taught us to engage in penis and G-Spot massage as part of a multiple orgasm program. Clenching the sphincter muscles due to being tense will certainly cause pain. The amount that a man will enjoy this depends on how he feels about it in general.