Nevertheless, the state did become involved, the man was discharged from the home, the administrator and the director were fired. We vacillate between thinking "cute" and "what are their families thinking, allowing this? Break up their fun? Are people able to consent to sex if they can't balance a checkbook, or if they can barely speak? Bryan Gruley's two stories on sex in care homes contain a lot more information and much worth your time to read in their entirety. And homes don't usually put locks on doors in case of emergencies, so staff members are absolutely going to see it happening. Why were the administrator and director fired over consensual sex of two residents? That is nothing new. Another was nicknamed 'Horny Smurf' because he used a blue cream on his hands for his arthritis, and one day an employee saw him through his window fighting a bout of hand to gland combat with his blue cream smeared all over his face. Many of these elders choose an assisted living center so they can be in comfortable surroundings with services provided and lots of social activity. It can still be a shock. When do people lose their right to chose what they do sexually? He's not sure that the man had any other intentions, but no one at the home wanted to find out. Problems occur when the family finds out about the situation unexpectedly, notes Evelyn Tenenbaum, a New York attorney who has written about the issue. With people living longer in assisted living and nursing homes, more romances among elders are blossoming. In the first of his two-part report, Gruley relates the story of two residents at the Windmill Manor home in Iowa who were caught by nurses in December , engaging in sex. This will become one of the most widely debated topics in elder care, as elders continue to spend more years in communal settings.