We simply compromise and make it work because we love each other. That is, in heterosexual relationships, it is just as common for men to have lower desire as a female partner1,2. You are a gorgeous, clever, witty, intelligent capable young woman with your whole life stretching ahead. I thought I had cancer, a thyroid imbalance, or my ovaries weren't releasing the proper hormones. Don't feel like you can't have sex just because you have no desire or don't climax. For many women, sexual desire is directly linked to how they're feeling about the relationship. Sam sits on the couch and feels guilty and ashamed, but just isn't in the mood and can't force it. An obvious question with an obvious answer. Show your partner how to touch you. For the first time, this study looks at the effect of the testosterone patches in naturally menopausal women as well as those who have undergone surgical or early menopause caused by chemotherapy or removal of their ovaries. Sex may be painful for her. Also, keep showing that love outside the bedroom, too. Whether your husband is outright controlling of you and tells you what to do, or if he is more passive aggressive in his controlling behavior, nobody likes to be controlled. Plus I can't participate at all, because any sign of interest from me gets him excited, which causes him pain and shuts the whole thing down. A recent study showed that nearly one-third of women aged 18 to 59 suffer from a lost interest in sex , and it's not all in their heads. Become technically proficient in turning on your partner sexually.