Erections spring at the slightest provocation in young men. Yet, the context of the relationship — for instance, a fight with his wife — can still spoil his appetite. Not avoid the issue. Making love literally creates a deep feeling of attachment to his partner and spurs relational generosity , faith , and optimism. While most women may wish for an emotional connection before having a physical connection, for men sexual connection is often necessary to feel safe enough for emotional vulnerability. Every flirtation , smile, innuendo, shapely figure, or sexual image, whether fantasized or real, is a hit on the male brain. According to McKenzie, about 98 percent of the men he counsels would say that their lack of sexual interest has nothing to do with how they feel about their partners. Here are six reasons your partner might not be having sex, and what you can do about them. Suggest he ask his doctor for a testosterone test. Laurie is available for sex therapy and marriage counseling online. Discuss the situation away from the bedroom. Slow down—this could be a sign that the guy wants to get to know you better before getting physical. He pushes through daily monotony, tantalized by the fantasy of a sexual reward at the end of a hard day. Take the declined invitation in stride and remember that, despite what your father might have told you before the prom, guys do have more than one thing on their minds. Yes, he wants to be full. Men have massive amounts of testosterone coursing through their bodies, pushing and driving them toward sexual expression. Being desired by his partner can be the single most reassuring part of his relationship.